Saturday, April 23, 2011

Dethklok - The Dethalbum (2007)

Do anything for Dethklok. That is the mantra of the world's biggest death metal band, and stars of the hit Cartoon Network epic, "Metalocalypse." The group combines the talents of Skwisgaar Skwigelf (taller than a tree), Toki Wartooth (not a bumblebee), William Murderface (Murderface Murderface), Pickles the Drummer (doodily doo ding dong doodily doodily doo) and of course, Nathan Explosion. More accurately, this album is the brainchild of Brendan Small, recorded with a little help from his friends, including the legendary Gene Hoglan on drums.

Ever wanted to commit mermaid murder? Now you can! With the assist of the opening track, titled "Murmaider," that is. From the planning, to the execution and subsequent revenge, this song gives you a list of necessary steps to follow in your quest. Dark chugging and the signature death metal growls kick off the album with a blast. "Go Into The Water," tells the story of a changing world, one where we will all go into the water to live and die. Taken from the band's "Dethwater" album, it is not to be taken literally. After all, the album was intended to be for fish only. Skwigelf's guitar work is top notch, with a hook to envy.

The band bring to life the evil Mustakrakish, the lake troll, with there high octane, double kick laden "Awaken." Played at the speed of light, every note, every snare, every tom is delivered with precision and force. Better watch out, Finland. Explosions vocals are highlighted in the scientific masterpiece, "Bloodrocuted," which might serve as the precursor to the aptly titled "Go Forth And Die." Certainly a commencement speech to remember, and a reminder that while you may be smarter, more beautiful or more wealthy, we are all dying.

"Fansong" finds the group thanking us, the fans, for not only buying their albums, but also giving them something to hate along the way. From the metal gallop of "The Lost Vikings" and "Thunderhorse," to the Monday through Friday workplace  thrash in "Briefcase Full Of Guts," all of your favorites are here. The old fashioned, boring rendition of "Happy Birthday" is out, replaced with the high speed, growling "Birthday Dethday." A story of birth through death, it is as heavy as it is festive. RSVP, please.

A fight song of the highest order, "Face Fisted" gives us the lyrical genius that is "I'm so fucking tough, I'm so fucking tough, That's right." Almost sounds like a Hatebreed song. At this time of year, when tax season looms, "Dethharmonic" is the anthem you have been searching for. Paired with the London Philharmonic Orchestra at a major charity event, the band ponders the merits of taxes. The tempo slows to half speed, with crashing cymbals ringing over exquisite strings.

The deluxe edition of the album comes complete with a bonus disc of hits, from the "Duncan Hills Coffee Jingle" to the theme to their very own movie flop, "Blood Ocean." Remember when Dethklok learned the ways of the blues from good ol' Mashed Potatoes Johnson? Relive that dark time with the not-quite-bluesy "Murdertrain A Comin'," including a blazing solo from Skwigelf, the world's fastest guitarist.

Brendan Small has crafted something that is both brutal and hilarious. The album will appeal to die hard fans of death metal or metal in general, as well as anyone looking for a tongue-in-cheek laugh. Fictional or not, I find myself wanting to do anything for Dethklok. The Metalocalypse has begun.


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